Wednesday, October 31, 2007

The Dark Side or No, I Don't Really Believe in the Devil

A blogging friend wrote something recently that made me think. She said something like she is a more popular blogger when she is going through hard times, struggles, and crisis, but that she wanted to go back to sharing more of the celebrations and sweetness in her life, even if she would loose some of her readers. Something like that anyway. Hmmm. It has made me ponder my own needs and hopes for MakingPeace. I know I have chosen to focus on what feels beautiful and celebratory here. Although, is this boring? Am I real enough? Why do I blog? Do I want to express my struggles, and what feels so tender here?

That said, I have been struggling. I've been feeling intensely anxious, confused, angry, vulnerable, sad, stressed, just to try to name it. The move, my brain chemistry, an uncertain future, health, aging, genetics? I don't know. I'm working on it though!

I look at many blogs and I see into what looks like "perfect" lives, and I want to create no illusions here. My life is just like yours. Ups and downs, beauty and intense struggle.

2 comments:

Project Pink Suitcase said...

Life through a blog lens always looks good to me. I totally understand.
Life is not always so sweet, but like yourself I try to stay as positive as I can. I believe that positive energy out brings back more positive energy.
To me it's a win-win to try to stay positive. I always enjoy your blog on the sunny days and the gloomy days. We all have them. It is just life. Life is good. Keep up the great blog. I always enjoy your photos and seeing you and Annie on your adventures together.

Mariposa said...

Your blog is beautiful.

Are you okay after the earthquake?

I rather write about what we worked through. I also don't want to portray anyone in a negative light. It sometimes crosses my mind that we might look perfect, but I take a decent photo and decorating is my passion. I can't cook worth a darn, I struggle playing the piano, can't carry a tune and can't fold properly. :)